Sports Pokies, Tennis Pokies

Kaley Cuoco Tennis Pokies

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In the grand spirit of our tennis pokies, which by all rights should include other perverse sections like general sports pokies, or more more specific Jelena Dokic pokies, we present to you (drr-dr-drrrr trumpet sounding) Kaley Cuoco hammering the little green fuzzy tennis ball with yummy b-cup boobies falling out of the tanktop. I especially like that last photo, where the sunlight is shining down her top, highlighting those perky/sweaty gals while the nips stare on stoically. I have never seen Kaley on TV because my set still has rabbit ears and even the cone of tinfoil only allows me to get wheel of fortune on special nights. But I hear she’s on the show Big Bang Theory, which is quite the coincidence, because I could thoroughly enjoy a big bang with such a cutie. That little tennis skirt she’s wearing is doing me lots of favors, very distracting, with the tight little legs and the glowing 26-year-old yummy thighs. This is a great country to embrace such a great sport, isn’t it? I think women’s tennis is now my favorite sport. It used to be women’s gymnastics. I see we’ve never, er boned up on women’s gymnastics, which is a condition I should rectify immediately. Right after I finish undressing Kaley, this perfect little tennis hottie, with my eyes and my mouse.

I think I like the lesbianic scene the best.

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What I really need is a woman. Like, a real live one who talks and stuff. But the second priority is to find one as blonde and cute as Kaley, so I can take her out to a tennis court and see something phenomenal like this in person. Course, with my luck, she would probably wear a turtleneck and long pants and maybe even some latex gloves to avoid being contaminated by my… awesomeness.

Amateur Pokies

Random Pokies

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Here’s some random pokies for ya. Sometimes we concentrate on celebrities to the exclusion of all our amateur babes out there. Gotta get everybody a little bit of love. I realize some of these gals have kind of busted faces, but whatya gonna do? Get up in the boobies and quit worrying about the mugs, that’s what I say. At least sometimes. Especially when I’ve been drinking. I was in a bar the other night and I cozied up to this gal who had a nice soft sweater on and some deep cleavage. She had crazy horse teeth, and her hair looked like she had driven to the bar on a motorcycle in a rainstorm, but you cannot deny tha boobs. I pretty much appreciate all female bodyparts, I’m perverted that way, but clearly I have some kind of deep-seated appreciation (fascination?) with mammary glands. I think it was because I grew up watching Wonder Woman, but that’s a post for another day brother. Just don’t let me see a girl with a gold headband, or all hell is liable to break loose.

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Braless Celebrities, Braless Kate Upton

Kate Upton DD Braless

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Any braless boobies are good boobies. But when you find a sista who likes to sling her natural DD’s around sans bra, you’ve found a real gem. Kate Upton definitely qualifies as that. I went to her website one time trying to find out how old she was and if she was capable of having offspring with mutants like myself, and found she had made the mistake of facing her site with this flash video of her doing a guess jeans commercial and slipping her bra strap off her shoulder and then biting her fingernail suggestively. The video was roughly the size of a 55″ plasma tv like what I see when I go to walmart to buy vienna sausages. I seriously snorted and kicked and sort of whistled like a donkey 3 times, then I had to go out and wash my car so I could calm down. Kate has an uncle who is a congressman. No news on her aunts, or her mommie, or any indication of who it was that gave her the first portion of those measurements: 33D-25-36. She is a full-firgured model, which means when she doesn’t have any shoots for more than a couple of weeks she can be found sitting on a white leather couch with mussed up hair eating cheetos. She’s only 19 or 20, so we gotta catch this smoking hot burning star fast before she plumps up and turns into a pretty version of Rosanne Barr.

Braless Celebrities

Julianne Hough Huge Braless

Julianne Hough is known on some stages as one of the best ballroom dancers ever to boogie. She is known to some fans as a fantastic country singer. She is known in my pants as owner of the hottest, sexiest, most massively erotic blue eyes on planet earth. If you can for just one second get past the fact that her little b-cup boobies are sitting right there unsupported, uncupped, about to fall out of her cute little yellow dress which is slit damn near down to her knees, you will notice that her eyes are blue enough to freeze a glacier and awesome enough to prompt me to propose.

Yep, that’s right Julianne, it’s not your braless wantonness that inspires me to matrimonial lunacy, it’s those eyes that make me think of the Husky that bit my pinky toe off when I was eight years old. She is only 23 so really she’s too young to marry quite yet. I still have time to go out and get a degree in ophthalmology, and also a degree in dentistry, so that as I age and she ages right alongside me I can keep those perfect eyes and perfect teeth from degrading somehow and falling from the unattainable into the merely mortal category. Wow, imagine what she would look like in a halter top drinking a beer on the tailgate of my truck.

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